Diary #1: Caring For Others




I wonder if there is someone who actually cares about others, much more than themselves. I also wonder if there is someone who cares too much about others that they forgot to take care of themselves. Or perhaps even worse scenario is that other people just simply doesn’t care about “that person” because they think that “that one” person doesn’t need anyone to care about them in any way. 

After sometimes “that one person” thought to themselves. Am I not worthy of other people attention? Don’t they see how tired I am caring for others? Do I have to yell out how much I want people to care about me? Can’t they feel what I am feeling inside being the one person who cares too much about others? Yeah it feels nice to see the “gratitude” that they show when they appreciate what I’ve done. But it hurts me if they are not even paying attention to all the hard work I’ve done. 

I don’t know what it is that I wanted from caring too much about others. Is it selfish to be wanting something in return for all you hard work? I think not. We deserve to get “paid” by what we’ve done for others. If what we did was harvesting an apple for someone, does that someone has to pay with another act of ‘harvesting the apple’? I guess not, there is so many ways to be grateful to “the one person” who harvested the apple for us, a simple “thank you” would suffice. 

However I agree that expectations doesn’t always happen as in realities. Not everyone are as nice as how you treat them. And not everyone has the mindset “treat others as you would like to be treated by others”. Is it wrong to think that we should not be nice to everyone? I believe that NOT everyone deserves your kindness. I actually agree that no everyone knows your story, but some people are just asshole for the sake of being asshole and it is not our problem. Everyone got enough on their plates already so choose who you show your kindness to.
I guess when they say “everything that is too much is not a good idea” they were telling the truth from their experiences. I guess I will lie if I say I will try not to care too much now. But I can tell you that I have tried and willing to try again….

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